|superman can you save me from my own insecurities?
||[Jan. 8th, 2004|01:10 am]
|||||bruce lee band- superman||]|
i haven't updated in forever. i have been meaning to do so, i swear! lol. i just finnished catching up with everybody through their journals. i'd say about half of them made me sad. i talked to lillian earlier. she wasn't feeling good. it sort of made me look at myself and i asked myself why i was feeling good? i had nothing to be happy about. lol. i'd say for about a good chunk of my work day i felt crappy. i was mad and sometimes when people called in and wanted two numbers it was like they were asking TOOO much of me! lol. i'm a complete idoit and bitch for being mean today. i'm usually always in a good mood and am very polite with everybody. i was monitored for about an hour today...thank god they told me before hand so i was on my best behavior like usual except for today. lol. i wonder how many people were listening to me. people from here and at our center in daytona were listening to me. they said i sounded very professional and whatnot. hehe. good stuff. i had a one on one with my supervisor today. it went pretty good. i usually try to take as much time as possible during those talks so i can be off the phone for a while. lol. today i'd say it was a good 20mins or so. lol. we talked about piercings, tattoos, and teachers. she totally helped me out this month. i had about 23 or so late minutes for the month of december and instead of writing me up, she just gave me a talk. last month after she gave me a talk, for two weeks straight i was not late for work at all. hopefully i can force myself to be on time every fucking day!!! today i used my cell phone as an alarm clock for the first time. it was soo cute! it even has snooze on it! very fucking cute! my alarm clock is not working anymore so i need to go buy a new one asap. maybe tomorrow after work? we'll see.
this weather totally has me down. last week i was doing great at walking everyday and this week has been sooo fucking cold it is impossible to be outside for more than a few minutes. monday i went outside to go walk and i walked for a tiny bit then said fuck it and went back inside because i couldn't hack it! i was thinking about going to one of those curves for women places. tempting. one of my sisters was like "why don't you just buy a trampoline and use it in your room? it will be a lot cheaper!". i dunno about that. hehe. tempting too. haha. i really don't want to spend money on a membership type thing or anything costly right now. saturday night lillian took me driving in her car. it was soo awesome!!! she got bored but i had a blast driving her car! she let me drive for a little bit by myself and omg it was just the best feeling ever. i felt alone and at peace and listening to music made it even more awesome. right now i totally have my eyes and mind set on saving up for a car. i can't wait til i can go on road trips with friends....drive up to austin, san antonio or houston to see bands play. this weather needs to stop already and just go back to being warm already! oh yeah, and it needs to stop raining too! i just sat here for a minute and i heard the rain and thought i'd just add that too. lol.
i finally talked to joe recently! yay! i was soo happy! i hadn't talked to him since august! yesterday i received two fat envelopes with a bunch of stories and etc. that he's written lately. it is amazing. him and leah are fantastic and i'm happy to hear that.
i wanted to take lillian a little "hope you feel better soon" gift but i didn't get to tonight. i put together all my change to buy her oreos. :) hopefully i can buy them tomorrow and take them to her. i dunno which she likes better though...regular or double stuffed. i like double stuffed better, but thats me. hehe. she loves oreos and i'm sure that will cheer her up a bit. i hope she is able to find a job soon for her sake as well as sanity. good luck sweetie! a few nights ago she picked me up from work. we got the schnitz and came to my house and we watched "bottlerocket". it was funny and cheesy.
i recently purchased some 6 gauge earrings. they rock hardcore! i love them! they were a little costly so i'm gonna wait many months til i buy a smaller gauge. this guy victor who pierces at strange horizons showed me a couple of cool catalogs with some realllly cool earrings in them. i'm looking forward to going back there sometime. the place is really badass. i almost got a septum piercing last week! $45 at forever art...thats a damn good deal if you ask me. my nose has been itchy all this week so its a good thing i didn't get it! i'm gonna wait a little longer on that one but i'm almost positive that will be my next piercing! yay!
i started my period today(yesterday technically)....yeah, cos you really wanted to know right? haha. for the past three months i've started on the 7th...strange stuff. in november, it lasted 3 weeks...december was 2 weeks...and i'm really hoping this month it will go back to normal and just be 5 days! 2003 was weird...body-wise. i think i made out with someone on half or so of the first days of my periods this year. lol. it was weird. i'd just so happen to meet someone and with my luck we would make out on the first day of my period. weird eh? i haven't made out with anyone this month yet. lol. anywho...i better go to bed...its past 2am already! goodnight! adios!